Eleven

It's been a while again. I keep telling myself I need to write more to give myself something to do but I keep forgetting about my promises. And I keep hanging out with my boyfriend too much. So here I am at his house while he plays on his play station. He just got Super Street Fighter IV but he's mostly been playing the new Fallout. He dragged me to the midnight release of Fallout actually. That was dumb. We met with his friend who we call by his last name. I don't understand that actually, to call someone by their last name. He's an annoying kid. Usually the two of them go climbing and they're both guys. So it's not like they talk about much else other than rock climbing or video games. So this last name kid, he's currently addicted to Minecraft. Since I find absolutely no point to this game other than you're supposed to live, I don't play it. And he's one of the ones to go on the multiplayer games to try and help build some big thing. There are some cool stuff that have been built. But it's also totally pointless. Anyways, last name kid sounds like a loser, because he is one.

So I didn't start this post to talk about video games. I guess it's just on my mind since he's right here next to me playing them and Street Fighter has annoying sound effects so it doesn't really go away.

The real reason for this post started a couple years ago actually when I asked my dad's fiancee why she had so many home and garden magazines. And she introduced me to this idea of nesting. Now I've seen Juno (Jason Reitman) and I understand that nesting is a part of having a baby for a woman, how you have to ready your nest for your baby. But since she doesn't have any kids, it's almost depressing to watch her. [Pause]

It's 11:11 pm. Time to make a wish. And I wish my boyfriend didn't have such an asshole for a dad.

[OKGO] She doesn't have any kids, and she's 42 so it's pretty much too late. It's not as if she didn't want kids, she was just in a relationship that didn't work out when she was in her prime child-bearing years. That phrase is dumb--prime child-bearing years. So she focused on her work instead. And she's pretty high up now because of it. She's vice president or something which she's really proud of obviously. She's more of a feminist than I am.

A tangent from the current tangent: My dad thinks that there is only one degree of feminism and he thinks it's extreme. He thinks that feminists are all hardcore bra-burning women who believe that men shouldn't be in power and should be walked all over at every possible chance. He's wrong. End tangent.

So she is really cool since she doesn't have kids, but it's really sad that she doesn't at the same time. She's so in love with her nieces and nephews that you can just tell that she would have loved to have kids of her own. She spoils them so much. Instead she has a dog, which is fine, but the dog has become her child. She talks to her and the dog used to worship her but now that my dad is there full time, the dog loves him more since he takes her on walks while his fiancee is at work full time.

With nesting, she started introducing me to the idea when we went to an Anthropologie store. I love that place now. They have really nice clothes, all really cute, it's just too bad they're so expensive. She's gotten me a couple Christmas presents from there which have all been really cute. They also have a living section with plates and knobs and other knickknacks.

So she was the one to introduce me to home decor. Now I've been trying to make my room more my own. Now it's this really sick spring green color which I absolutely love. And I keep trying to find new cool stuff. I've found some really awesome things in Urban Outfitters. They have a home decor section as well. I was in there the other day and they have these matryoshka doll measuring cups. Those are the Russian dolls that fit inside each other. And there's six different cup sizes and three dolls. They're so cool I'm thinking about buying them for myself, just to be a decoration in the time being until I have my own kitchen. Christmas present to myself :)

And so this nesting thing has gone farther than just these material things AKA main point for writing this particular post. I keep having these ideas today about the future. My future life. I keep seeing my boyfriend in it. And we keep saying that we probably aren't going to last forever. We don't have this plan to get married or anything like that which is good since I don't want to be in that kind of serious relationship and he doesn't either. Everyone I've talked to finds this idea pretty odd since it's probably like what's the point of being in the relationship if you don't think you're going to get married. Which, honestly, I don't really care what they think about our relationship, because their opinion doesn't matter.

So my nesting thing. I keep thinking about having kids. And it all seems kinda soon and crazy. And now I don't remember where I was going so this is a little sad. But now I'm glad this whole idea isn't in my head anymore since I don't really want kids right now. Ok phew.